Other Titles • Cheech and Chong's Up in Smoke (1978) • Cheech and Chong: Up in Smoke • Viel Rauch um nichts (1978)
Quotes from Up in Smoke (1978)
1
Border Guard: So, how long you've been in Mexico? Pedro: A week. I mean a day. Border Guard: Well, which is it? A week or a day? Pedro: A weekday.
(36 votes)
2
Pedro: Hey how am I driving, man? Man Stoner: [looks around] : I think we're parked.
(37 votes)
3
Arnold Stoner: You get a goddamn job before sundown, or we're shipping you off to military school with the goddamn Finkelstein-shit kid! Son of a bitch!
(33 votes)
4
Pedro: Don't worry, man. Those aren't narcs, they're Las Emigras; you know, the Immigration Service looking for illegal aliens. Man Stoner: What's the Immigration Service doing here, man? Pedro: My cousin needed a ride to his brother's wedding in Tijuana; so he called the Emigras, man. They'll deport the entire wedding party, man. They get a free bus ride across the border and lunch. When the wedding is over, man, they'll just come back across the border.
(30 votes)
5
[Man has disguised himslef as a woman while hitchhiking] Man Stoner: Hey, man; I'm glad you picked me up, man. I was about to freeze my balls off. Pedro de Pacas: Man, I was hopin' you didn't have no balls.
(27 votes)
6
Man: You wanna get high man? Pedro: Does Howdy Doody got wooden Balls man?
(8 votes)
7
Pedro: Man, what is in this shit, man? Man Stoner: Mostly Maui Waui man, but it's got some Labrador in it. Pedro: What's Labrador? Man Stoner: It's dog shit. Pedro: What? Man Stoner: Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man. Pedro: Yeah? Man Stoner: I had it on the table and the little motherfucker ate it, man. Then I had to follow him around with a little baggie for three days, man, before I got it back. Really blew the dog's mind, ya know? Pedro: You mean we're smokin' dog shit, man? Man Stoner: Gets ya high, don't it? [Song, "Rockin' Robin" plays... ] Man Stoner: I think it's even better than before, you know? Pedro: Uhhh, I wonder what Great Dane tastes like, man.
(7 votes)
8
[stoned cop walks to window] Cop: What do you guys want?
(5 votes)
9
Strawberry: The great outdoors!
(3 votes)
10
Arresting Officer: Sir, could I please see your license? Pedro: Whuut? Arresting Officer: Your license. Where's your license? Pedro: It's back there on the bumper, man! Arresting Officer: No, I mean your DRIVER'S license. Pedro: Oh yeah, I got the bullshit back here man... [gets license with great difficulty] Pedro: Hey I thought'a somethin' really funny, man... Your mother! [laughs] Arresting Officer: [after dirty look, of course] Sir, what's your name? Pedro: uuhhh... Isn't in on the license, man? Yeah, that's it! Pedro La Parcas, man, that's my name...
(3 votes)
11
[Pedro is having a panic attack after smoking Man's dope] Man Stoner: Here, man, mellow out. Here, take this [Pedro swallows the capsule] Man Stoner: No, wait a minute don't take that. Pedro: [Worried] Hey, man; what was that shit you gave me? Man Stoner: Man, that was the most acid I ever saw anyone take at one time, man. Pedro: [panicing] Acid! Man, I don't mess with that shit, man. A guy in my neighborhood took some once, his head swelled up and everything, man! Man Stoner: [laughing] Ho, ho, ho; man, I hope you're not planning on doing anything for the next couple of months.
(2 votes)
12
Pedro: It's punk rock, Man! We can do that; we can be punks, Man!
(1 vote)
13
Man Stoner: Man my legs hurt. Pedro: Yeah I bet!
14
Arnold Stoner: When, boy? When, are you gonna get your act together?
15
Man Stoner: Yeah, that 'Nam grass will fuck anyone up, man!
16
Pedro: [laughing while stoned] Way anchor! How much does it weigh? I don't know, I forgot! pffhhh! Ha ha I saw that in a movie once...!
17
Arresting Officer: [to Man] Sir, what's your name? Pedro: Whut? I told you my name, man! Arresting Officer: [to Man] Sir... what's YOUR name? Pedro: [to Man] Hey man! The dude wants to know your name, man! [Man vomits onto the floor of the car] Pedro: Uuhhh - His name is RAALLLPH, man!
18
Man Stoner: [to Pedro, who is in the throes of panic] HEY! MELLOW OUT, MAN!
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