Other Titles • Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang • L.A.P.I. • You'll Never Die in This Town Again
Quotes from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)
1
Perry Van Shrike: You're an idiot. You know that. You know if you looked in the dictionary next to the word "idiot" you know what you'll find? Harry Lockhart: A picture of me? Perry Van Shrike: No! The definition of the word "idiot". Which you are.
(129 votes)
2
Perry Van Shrike: This isn't good cop, bad cop. This is fag and New Yorker.
(93 votes)
3
Perry Van Shrike: Ok, where's my gun? Harry Lockhart: I uh, threw it in the lake because I figured you wouldn't and I would. I got priors in New York, so I really can't be messing around. Perry Van Shrike: You threw it in the lake? Harry Lockhart: Yeah, plus it was evidence. Perry Van Shrike: You what? [starts to hit Harry] Harry Lockhart: Watch it! Perry Van Shrike: Ok, ok, ok, I'm sorry. I got a little nonplussed there. Harry Lockhart: This is crazy. I understand that. Perry Van Shrike: Whoa, what's that? [check out briefcase in Harry's hands] Perry Van Shrike: Is that a clue? Can you see that? Harry Lockhart: What do you mean? [Perry hits Harry on the head with the briefcase] Harry Lockhart: Ouch! Perry Van Shrike: What were you thinking? My 2,000 dollar ceramic vector my mother got me as a special gift you threw in the lake next to the car! What happens when they drag the lake, you think they'll find my pistol? [walks away] Perry Van Shrike: Jesus! [turns around] Perry Van Shrike: Look up idiot in the dictionary. You know what you'll find? Harry Lockhart: A picture of me? Perry Van Shrike: No! The definition of idiot. Which you are!
(94 votes)
4
Harry Lockhart: [after meeting "Gay Perry"] Still gay? Perry Van Shrike: No, knee-deep in pussy. I just love the name so much I can't get rid of it.
(92 votes)
5
Harry Lockhart: This is every shade of wrong.
(90 votes)
6
Harry Lockhart: Don't worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. I'm not going to end this 17 times.
(7 votes)
7
Perry Van Shrike: [to the audience] Thanks for coming, please stay for the end credits, if you're wondering who the best boy is, it's somebody's nephew, um, don't forget to validate your parking, and to all you good people in the Midwest, sorry we said fuck so much.
(7 votes)
8
B-Movie Actress: So what do you do? Harry Lockhart: I'm retired, I invented dice. What do you do?
(5 votes)
9
Perry Van Shrike: [about his derringer] I call it my "faggot gun," because it's only good for a couple of shots and then you have to drop it for something better.
(5 votes)
10
Perry Van Shrike: [on the phone] What do you mean they gave her back?
(3 votes)
11
Harmony Age 7: I'm going to be an actress.
(6 votes)
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