Other Titles • The Return of the Living Dead • Verdammt, die Zombies kommen (1986)
Quotes from The Return of the Living Dead (1985)
1
Suicide: You think this is a fuckin' costume? This is a way of life.
(44 votes)
2
Trash: Do you ever wonder about all the different ways of dying? You know, violently? And wonder, like, what would be the most horrible way to die? Spider: I try not too think about dying too much. Trash: Mm. Well for me, the worst way would be for a bunch of old men to get around me, and start biting and eating me alive. Spider: I see. Trash: First, they would tear off my clothes... Chuck: Hey, somebody get some light over here, Trash is taking off her clothes again.
(53 votes)
3
Frank: Did you see that movie, "Night of the Living Dead"? Freddy: yeah,that's where the corpses started eating the people,right, Frank: Yeah, did you know that movie was based on a true case?
(48 votes)
4
Burt Wilson: I thought you said that if we destroyed the brain, it would die. Frank: well it worked in the movie. Burt Wilson: Well it ain't working now. Freddy: You mean the movie lied?
(45 votes)
5
Casey: Chuck, I never did like you. Oh, but God, hold me tight.
(40 votes)
6
Frank: Watch your tongue, boy, if you like this job! Freddy: Like this job?
(30 votes)
7
Tarman: BRAINS! Live brains!
(4 votes)
8
Spider: What do you want to do, Scuz, turn over gravestones? Scuz: No I just want to look around the graveyard I never seen one before. Spider: haven't you ever been to a funeral? Scuz: I never knew anyone that died.
(3 votes)
9
Zombie: Send... more... paramedics.
10
Freddy: But I don't care darling, because I love you, and you've got to let me eat your brains.
11
Frank: International treaty, all skeletons come from India. Freddy: No kidding, how come? Frank: How the hell do I know how come? The important question is, where do they get all the skeletons with perfect teeth?
12
Ernie Kaltenbrunner: What the hell are in those bags? Burt Wilson: Rabid weasels. Ernie Kaltenbrunner: What? What the hell are you doing with a bunch of rabid weasels? Burt Wilson: That's what I was trying to explain to you here ernie, they came in as part of a shipment. Of course, they weren't supposed to be rabid.
13
Casey: Hey, is that Freddy? Chuck: Where? Casey: Over there, going into that building. Chuck: No. That is NOT Freddy. Casey: How would you know? Chuck: Because, why would Freddy be going into a mortuary?
14
Paramedic #1: You have no pulse, your blood pressure's zero-over-zero, you have no pupillary response, no reflexes and your temperature is 70 degrees. Freddy: Well, what does that mean? Paramedic #1: Well, it's a puzzle because, technically, you're not alive. Except you're conscious, so we don't know what it means. Freddy: Are you saying we're dead? Paramedic #2: Well, let's not jump to conclusions. Freddy: Are you saying we're dead? Paramedic #2: No conclusions. Paramedic #1: Obviously I didn't mean you were really dead. Dead people don't move around and talk.
15
Suicide: How come you guys only come around when you need a ride someplace? Spider: Cuz you're one spooky motherfucker man.
16
Freddy: You made me break my hand completely off, Tina.
17
Freddy: [to Tina] See? You made me hurt myself again! I broke my hand off completely at the wrist this Time tina! But that's okay, Darlin, because I love you, and that's why you have to let me EAT YOUR BRAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIINS!
18
Ernie Kaltenbrunner: You can Hear me, 1/2 Woman Corpse: Yes. Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Why do you eat people? 1/2 Woman Corpse: Not people. Brains. Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Brains only? 1/2 Woman Corpse: Yes. Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Why? 1/2 Woman Corpse: The PAIN! Ernie Kaltenbrunner: What about the pain? 1/2 Woman Corpse: The pain of being DEAD! Ernie Kaltenbrunner: [laughs uneasily to his friends] It hurts... to be dead. 1/2 Woman Corpse: I can feel myself rotted. Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Eating brains... How does that make you feel? 1/2 Woman Corpse: It makes the pain go away!
19
Ethel Glover: How was your day, dear? Col. Horace Glover: The usual. Crap. Ethel Glover: Oh. Well I'm sorry, I made Your favorite lamb chops! Col. Horace Glover: I had them for lunch.
20
Col. Horace Glover: [on the telephone] It seems we've found that lost assignmant of Easter eggs. We're getting confirmation on this from the Louisville Police Department. Well, sir, that would be good news, but the eggs have hatched.
21
Burt Wilson: What about the bones? Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Bones are no problem. The hardest part to burn is the heart. Burt Wilson: Why's that? Ernie Kaltenbrunner: It's one big muscle. Burt Wilson: Well, Ernie, we don't want the heart hanging around! Ernie Kaltenbrunner: Then I'll turn it up hotter for the heart.
22
Burt Wilson: Put that gun away, Ernie! Befor you shoot somebody!
23
Spider: [to Burt] Come on, you stupid honky!
24
Freddy: I can finally see, the one thing... the only thing that will relieve this horrible suffering. Tina: What, Freddy? What? Freddy: Live... BRAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIINS!
25
Freddy: [to Tina] It was wrong of you to lock me up. I had to hurt myself to get out. And I know you're in here, because I can smell your brains.
26
[Burt is on the phone to the police squad captain] Burt Wilson: Listen, there's a bunch of people from the cemetery who are stark, staring, mad, and they'll kill you and eat you if they catch you. It's like a disease. It's like rabies, only faster, a lot faster. That's why you've got to come and get us out of here now, right now.
27
Spider: I ain't in no mood to die tonight.
28
Chuck: Hey, Casey, do you like sex with death? Casey: Yeah, so fuck off and die.
29
Burt Wilson: You know It's weird,they say that they have been been waiting for this to happen,and they have some kind of contingency plan to deal with it! Spider: What is this plan?
30
Burt Wilson: One question, Frank... This guy screaming in here, you sure it's a dead cadaver? Frank: Why don't you open the door and find out? Burt Wilson: Eh, I'm sorry Frank, I'll take your word for that
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