Joanie: You're terrible, Muriel. Bill: Deidre Chambers. What a coincidence.
(16 votes)
2
Rhonda: I had cancer... it's all right, they cut it out. Cheryl: You were so full of life. Rhonda: I'm not DEAD Cheryl.
(15 votes)
3
Rhonda: You're right, you are a new person, and you stink. "Mariel VanArkle" stinks. And she's not half the person Muriel Heslop was.
(15 votes)
4
Tania: Well we, you know, and he couldn't so I... (makes hand to mouth gesture)... and I noticed there was lipstick on it. Janine: On what? Tania: His dick.
(15 votes)
5
Bill: Did Perry interview for the police force yet? Betty: Yes but they said he couldn't join because he was too tall.
(12 votes)
6
Tania: He says they're not sleeping together. She only sucks him off. Cheryl: Why? Tania: Out of respect for me. Nicole: Bitch.
7
Nicole: Muriel... Cheryl: Wait. Let her finish her Orgasm.
8
Muriel: Bikkie? Brice: Maybe after... I mean later.
9
Muriel: When I lived in Porpoise Spit, no one looked at me. But when I moved to Sydney, Brice asked me out and that proves that I changed and I'm not her anymore. Rhonda: Her? Muriel: Muriel! Muriel Heslop. Stupid, fat and useless. I hate her! I'm never going back to being her again! Why can't it be me? Why can't I be the one?
10
Coach Ken Blundell: All the guests are on her side. I should have bought you more friends.
11
Dierdre: Beauty Consultant. I advise women on their lipstick, base and eye liner. (to Japanese businessmen) But you should all know about make-up. Your wives must be geishas.
12
Muriel: Are you black? David: What?
13
Rhonda: [regarding her tumor] So, how'd I get it? It's not from having too much sex, is it?
14
Nicole: People invite us to parties because they know we have a good time. We're mad. Janine: Pah-ty, pah-ty, pah-ty. Nicole: It's our ee-mage. Muriel: We're mad!
15
Rhonda: I've seen your book. You've tried on every dress in Sydney! Muriel: That doesn't mean I'm gonna get married. Rhonda: Then what DOES it mean? Muriel: It means I WANT to get married. I've always wanted to get married.
16
Rhonda: Cancer? Oh my God! I am gonna go bald and have to eat macrobiotic food!
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