Other Titles • Young Frankenstein • Frankenstein Junior (1975)
Quotes from Young Frankenstein (1974)
1
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Igor, would you mind telling me whose brain I did put in? Igor: And you won't be angry? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I will NOT be angry. Igor: Abby someone. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Abby someone. Abby who? Igor: Abby Normal. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Abby Normal? Igor: I'm almost sure that was the name. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into a seven and a half foot long, fifty-four inch wide GORILLA? IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME?
(42 votes)
2
Inga: Werewolf! Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Werewolf? Igor: There. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What? Igor: There, wolf. There, castle. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Why are you talking that way. Igor: I thought you wanted to. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, I don't want to. Igor: Suit yourself. I'm easy.
(29 votes)
3
[Frankenstein, Igor and Inga in front of HUGE castle doors] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What knockers. Inga: Oh, thank you doctor.
(26 votes)
4
[Froederick and Igor are exhuming a dead criminal] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What a filthy job. Igor: Could be worse. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: How? Igor: Could be raining. [it starts to pour]
(23 votes)
5
Inspector Kemp: Vee had better confeerm de fect dat Yunk Frankenshtein iss indeed VALLOWING EEN EES GANDFADDA'S VOOTSHTAPS. Villagers: What? Inspector Kemp: Following in his grandfather's footsteps, footsteps, footsteps. Villagers: Ohhh. Footsteps.
(23 votes)
6
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You know, I'm a rather brilliant surgeon. Perhaps I can help you with that hump. Igor: What hump?
(7 votes)
7
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: LIFE! DO YOU HEAR ME? GIVE MY CREATION... LIFE!
(4 votes)
8
[Friedrich arrives at the Transylvania station] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Pardon me, boy. Is this the Transylvania station? Shoe-Shine Boy: Ja, ja. Track 29. Can I give you a shine?
(1 vote)
9
"Can I get you some-sing, Doctor, some varm meelk, perhaps?"--Frau Blucher
"What knockers!"--Frederick as he simultaneously looks at the doors to the castle and helps Inga (Teri Garr) down from the horse-drawn cart
15
"Sank you, Doctor!" she fetchingly replies
16
Igor: My grandfather used to work for your grandfather. Of course the rates have gone up.
17
Igor: You know, I'll never forget my old dad. When these things would happen to him... the things he'd say to me. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What did he say? Igor: "What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night? Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?"
18
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [dreaming] I am not a Frankenstein. I'm a Fronkensteen. Don't give me that. I don't believe in fate. And I won't say it. [pauses] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: All right, you win. You win. I give. I'll say it. I'll say it. I'll say it. DESTINY! DESTINY! NO ESCAPING THAT FOR ME! DESTINY! DESTINY! NO ESCAPING THAT FOR ME!
19
[From inside the haycart] Inga: Hallo. Vould you like a roll in ze hay? [Dr. Frankenstein stutters] Inga: It's fun. [She begins to roll in the hay] Inga: Roll, roll, roll in ze hay.
20
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Igor, would you give me a hand with the bags? Igor: [doing a Groucho Marx] Certainly, you take the blonde and I'll take the one in the turban.
21
Frau Blücher: Would the doctor care for a brandy before retiring? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No. Thank you. Frau Blücher: Some varm milk... perhaps? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No. Thank you very much. No thanks. Frau Blücher: Ovaltine? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: NOTHING! Thank you. I'm a little tired. Frau Blücher: Then I vill say... goodnight. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Goodnight.
22
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That music... Frau Blücher: Yes. It's in your blood - it's in the blood of ALL Frankensteins. It reaches the soul when words are useless. Your grandfather used to play it to the creature HE vas making. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Then it was you all the time. Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You played that music in the middle of the night... Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: ...to get us to the laboratory. Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That was YOUR cigar smoldering in the ashtray. Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: And it was you... who left my grandfather's book out for me to find. Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: So that I would... Frau Blücher: Yes. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Then you and Victor were... Frau Blücher: YES. YES. Say it. He vas my... BOYFRIEND.
23
[Dr. Frankenstein leans in for a kiss] Elizabeth: Taffeta, darling. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Taffeta, sweetheart. Elizabeth: [pulling away] No, the dress is taffeta. It wrinkles so easily.
24
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: For what we are about to see next, we must enter quietly into the realm of genius.
25
Igor: Dr. Frankenstein... Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: "Fronkensteen." Igor: You're putting me on. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, it's pronounced "Fronkensteen." Igor: Do you also say "Froaderick"? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No..."Frederick." Igor: Well, why isn't it "Froaderick Fronkensteen"? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: It isn't; it's "Frederick Fronensteen." Igor: I see. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You must be Igor. [He pronounces it ee-gor] Igor: No, it's pronounced "eye-gor." Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: But they told me it was "ee-gor." Igor: Well, they were wrong then, weren't they?
26
Inga: Werewolf Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Werewolf? Igor: There. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What? Igor: There wolf. There castle.
27
Medical Student: Isn't it true that Darwin preserved a piece of vermicelli in a glass case until, by some extrordinary means, it actually began to move with voluntary motion? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Are you speaking of the worm or the spaghetti? Medical Student: Why, the worm, sir. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Yes, I did read something of that incident when I was a student, but you have to remember that a worm... with very few exceptions... is not a human being. Medical Student: But wasn't that the whole basis of your grandfather's work? The reanimation of dead tissue? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: My grandfather was a very sick man. Medical Student: But as a Fronkensteen, aren't you the least bit curious about it? Doesn't the bringing back to life what was once dead hold any intrigue to you? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You are talking about the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind! Dead is dead! Medical Student: But look at what has been done with hearts and kidneys... Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Hearts and kidneys are tinker toys! I am talking about the central nervous system!
28
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What is this place? Igor: Music room? [tunes violin]
29
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Are you ready? Igor: Are you sure this is how they did it? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Yes! It's all written down in the notes! Now tie off the kites and hurry down as fast as you can! Igor: What's the hurry? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: There's a possibility of electrecution! Do you understand? [no answer, shouts] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I said, there is a possibility of electrecution! Do you understand? Igor: [suddenly appears next to Fredrick] I understand. I understand. Why are you shouting.
30
Igor: What is this? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Swartzwalter Keurztort. The Monster: [off-screen] MMMMMMM! Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Oh, do you like it? I'm not partial to desserts myself, but this is excellent. Igor: Who are you talking to? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: To you. You just made a yummy sound, so I thought you liked the dessert. Igor: I didn't make a yummy sound, I just asked you what it is. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: But you did. I just heard it. Igor: It wasn't me. Inga: It wasn't me. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Well, now look here. If it wasn't you, and it wasn't you... [he asks himself] The Monster: [off-camera] Mmmmmm!
31
Igor: Sed-a... Inga: Sed-a... Igor: Dirty word! He said a dirty word!
32
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Sit down, won't you? [Igor sits on the floor] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, no, up here. [Igor gets up onto a stool]
33
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Gone! Gone! We've got to find him, you understand? We've got to find him before he kills someone! What have I done? Oh God in Heaven! What have I done?
(1 vote)
34
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: My fellow scienti... Audience: Ssssssssssssssss! Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: ...tists... and neuro-surgeons, ladies and gentlemen. A few short weeks ago coming from a background, believe me, as conservably and traditionaly grounded in scientific fact as any of you, I began an experiment in... incredulous as it may sound... the reanimation of dead tissue.
35
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Please! Remain in your seats, I beg you! We are not children here, we are scientists! I assure you there is nothing to fear!
36
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Please, I beg you! For safety's sake, don't humiliate him!
37
Frau Blücher: I came to tell you that your fiance should be arriving any second! Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [shirtless] Elizabeth! Here, tonight? Frau Blücher: I suggest you put on a tie!
38
Elizabeth: No tongues.
39
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Have all the preperations been made for the transferance? Inga: Yes, doctor. Igor: Are you sure you want to go through with this? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: It's the only thing that can save him now. Igor: You realize you're risking both your lives? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [plays a sour note] Yes.
40
Inga: Hold on to your hat! I'll be right back. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [literally holds onto his hat] I'm holding onto it, Darling! Inga: Just a few more seconds.
41
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Damn your eyes. Igor: [to camera] Too late.
42
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: For the experiment to be a success, all of the body parts must be enlarged. Inga: His veins, his feet, his hands, his organs vould all have to be increased in size. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Exactly. Inga: He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That goes without saying. Inga: Voof. Igor: He's going to be very popular.
43
[after sex with The Monster] Elizabeth: Oh. Where you going?... Oh, you men are all alike. Seven or eight quick ones and then you're out with the boys to boast and brag. YOU BETTER KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. Oh... I think I love him.
44
[Upon seeing the monster's manhood] Elizabeth: Oh my God. Woof.
45
[in Victor Frankenstein's laboratory] Igor: [sings] I ain't got no body, and nobody cares for me. Yakka tak ta a yakka tak ta ha! Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Igor. Igor: Froedrick. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: How did you get here? Igor: Through the dumbwaiter.
46
[as monster runs out the door] The Blindman: Wait. Where are you going? I was going to make Espresso.
47
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I am a scientist, not a philosopher! You have more chance of reanimating this scalpel than you have of mending a broken nervous system! Medical Student: But what about your grandfather's work, sir? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: My grandfather's work was doodoo! I am not interested in death! The only thing that concerns me is the preservation of life! [jams the scalpel into his leg, lets go of the scalpel and it sticks upright out of his leg, grasps it again, then slowly crosses his legs to block the scalpel from view] Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Class... is... dismissed.
48
Inspector Kemp: A riot is an ungly thing... undt, I tink, that it is chust about time ve had vun.
49
Igor: Wait Master, it might be dangerous... you go first.
50
Inspector Kemp: Let's all go have some sponge cake and a little wine... [his mechanical arm slips off] Inspector Kemp: and shit.
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