Other Titles • Super Mario Brothers (1993) • Super Mario Brothers: The Movie (1992)
Quotes from Super Mario Bros. (1993)
1
Desk Sergeant: Name. Mario: Mario. Desk Sergeant: Last name. Mario: Mario. Desk Sergeant: And you? Luigi: Luigi. Desk Sergeant: Luigi Luigi? Luigi: No, Luigi Mario. Desk Sergeant: Okay how many Marios are there between the two of you? Luigi: Three: Mario Mario and Luigi Mario.
(16 votes)
2
"It comes from sitting on my butt all day playing video games." (Luigi, explaining why he is so adept at modern technology)
(19 votes)
3
"Strap your belt on, kid. We're going in." (Mario to his brother Luigi)
(15 votes)
4
"Mario, I gotta feeling. I gotta feeling we're not in Brooklyn no more." (Luigi)
(15 votes)
5
"Trust the fungus." (Luigi)
(15 votes)
6
Pizza Delivery Man: Python Pizza here, may I help you? King Koopa: King Koopa here. Pizza Delivery Man: Oh, yes sir. King Koopa: I'd like the Koopa Special. Pizza Delivery Man: Pterodactyl tail on that? King Koopa: Yes. Dino, lizard, hold the mammal, no worms... and, uh, spicy.
7
Mario: How are we gonna get in there? I got two words for you: Im-possible. Luigi: Nothing is impossible, Mario. Improbable, Unlikely, but never impossible.
8
Luigi: Anything is possible, Mario, you just gotta believe in it.
9
[In the police car, a wanted poster of Luigi and Mario flashes on a TV screen naming them Alien Plumbers] Luigi Mario: Aliens? We gotta deal with aliens too? Mario Mario: Luigi, *we're* the aliens. Luigi Mario: We are? Wow, cool.
10
[Mario and Luigi survey Dinohattan] Mario Mario: This can't be Manhattan. Luigi Mario: I don't know, I haven't been to Manhattan in a couple weeks. Mario Mario: Must have been a bad couple of weeks.
11
Princess Daisy: I'm a vegetarian, I don't eat anything with a face.
12
Mario Mario: Excuse me, do you know where we are? Pedestrian: Yeah, you're in my way.
13
King Koopa: My, my, someone got up on the wrong side of the nest this morning.
14
King Koopa: [bathing in mud] Do you know what I love about mud? It's clean and it's dirty at the same time.
15
Mario: Great, a building with athlete's foot.
16
Luigi: Remember, trust the fungus.
17
Mario: Mario Brothers Plumbing, no leak too small.
18
Cop: Nobody touches President Koopa. Luigi: [Rubbing his eyes in pain] But he said he was... King Koopa: -One evil, egg sucking son of a snake. Did I lie?
19
Toad: Say, what's another word that rhymes with dimension? Mario: Yeah, tension, and I'm full of it so shut up.
20
King Koopa: I'll kill that plumber.
21
King Koopa: Now... where's the rock? [Iggy and Spike look at each other, then at Koopa] Iggy: [together] Rock, sir? Spike: [together] Rock, sir? King Koopa: The meteorite piece that she wears around her neck, and I told you not to forget it! Spike: That rock! Iggy: I told you not to forget it! King Koopa: And I told *you* to remind him! Without that rock, the meteorite lays dormant! I'll not be able to merge the dimensions! Where is it? Iggy: [together] ...The plumbers took it. Spike: [together] ...The plumbers took it. King Koopa: [whispers] Plumbers? [to Lena] King Koopa: Plumber alert!
22
Luigi: Wow, you mean there were dinosaurs here in Brooklyn? Mario: Relax, Luigi. There used to be Dodgers here too.
23
Mario: Strap your belt on, kid. We're going in!
24
Cop: [sees the Marios' tool belts] Aha! Plumbers! Luigi: No, he is! I'm just apprenticing! Cop: Get in the car! Luigi: But i didn't do nothing! Cop: Get in the car now! Mario: Are you telling us that you can arrest a guy for being a plumber?! Cop: Get in there, plumber! Now! Luigi: What'd we do? Mario: I'm being arrested for being a plumber!
25
King Koopa: You may think of evolution as... an upward process. Things evolve from primeval slime, up to single-celled organisms, up to... intelligent life. De-evolution, of course, works the opposite way. Back to... simpler forms. For instance, even our musical friend Toad... can become... a loyal child of the royal family: Goombas! [snickers]
26
Mario: What single-celled organism did *you* evolve from? King Koopa: [indicates an evolution chart of a dinosaur becoming a man] Tyrannosaurus Rex, the lizard king, thank you very much.
27
[the Marios try to escape in a police car] Mario: Where's the starter on this thing? Luigi: I got a feeling about this, Marioroni... [figures out the strange controls to start the car] Mario: How do you know how to do that? Luigi: Cuz I been sitting on my butt all day playing video games, that's what.
28
Mario: [drives towards a fork] Which way? Luigi: Take the parkway! Mario: Right! [drives into a tunnel instead] Luigi: [smiles] Perfect, perfect. Mario: You said the parkway! Luigi: I know, but I wanted the tunnel, so I said parkway cuz I knew you'd go the opposite way I suggested! Ha!
29
Spike: [has had his brain evolved to higher intelligence] Ignatius, do you know what the square root of 26,481 is? Iggy: What are you talking about? Spike: 191!
30
[Iggy and Spike have become more intelligent] King Koopa: Both of you, go to the desert! Iggy: Excuse me, excuse me. That hardly seems logical, does it? Perhaps we should stay here and formulate our own strategy. Tete-tete, inner circle, that sort of thing. King Koopa: Here's what's logical to me: If you do not return with the plumbers and the rock... I shall personally... kill you. Iggy: ...We're going.
31
Mario: [trying to get a dance with Big Bertha] Hey, the name's Mario. I'm your main man, your ram-a-dame, your can of spam - Bertha: [punches him and laughs] Mario: [second try] Excuse me. Will you hit me again? I've never seen such fluidity. The way your knuckles crunched as you smashed 'em into my face. Bertha: [grabs him by the jacket] Dance with me. I'll hit you all you like.
32
King Koopa: I am very disappointed in you, cousins. Spike: Fascist! Iggy: Oppressor of the proletariat! King Koopa: Guy in charge!
33
King Koopa: ...where's my pizza?
34
Mario: Hey, you must be the girls, the missing girls from Brooklyn! Daniella: Yea, except Angelica. She's from Queens, but she's all right.
35
Luigi: Let's go! Brooklyn Girls: Who are you? Luigi: Luigi Mario. What, you got a problem with that?
36
TV Announcer: I'd call them the *Super* Mario Brothers.
37
Spike: We were wrong again. How many times have we got this wrong? Iggy: *You've* gotten it wrong five times. Spike: Home for five. Home for five. What percent is that? Iggy: I dunno. Let me think. [pause] Iggy: I dunno. But it's not good. Spike: If we get it wrong one more time, he's gonna kill us. Iggy: He's not gonna kill us. He's not that nice.
38
Luigi: By the bar, that big lady with the red spikes took the rock. Iggy: Was she corpulent? Very corpulent? Luigi: No no, she was just really round. Spike: Ah-ha! [snapping fingers] Spike: Big Bertha! The bouncer at the Boom-Boom Bar!
39
Luigi: Where's Daisy, butt-breath? Iggy: Where's the rock, scalawag? Luigi: Where's Daisy, biscuit-head?
40
Luigi: Do you eat? Princess Daisy: Yes. Luigi: Dinner? Princess Daisy: Yes. Luigi: Tonight?
41
Luigi: It is an honor to meet you sir, and a pleasure, and I just wanna thank you for all your help. Mario: Come on, Luigi. You'll be talking to the mildew in the shower next.
42
[Entering the Boom Boom Bar] Luigi: Isn't this a little bit feminine? Iggy: Yes, I know. It was my ex wife's. Mario: But you wear this stuff? Spike: Yes. On occasion, we have a... date. Mario: Who do you date, a canary?
43
Luigi: [driving] I've heard sea turtles travel thousands of miles on their own. Mario: Not in New York traffic, they don't.
44
Mario: Turn left here. [Luigi turns right] Mario: LEFT. I SAID LEFT.
45
Daisy: How's Daniella? Mario: Oh, Daniella! I promised to take her to Wrestlemania.
46
Luigi: Hey, Mario! Right now on "Miraculous World", this guy just found out he was in another dimension. Mario: The only thing miraculous *I* know is that we're still eating while we're going broke. Luigi: We aint going broke, Mario, we're already there!
47
Spike: [sniffing a hot dog] [to Iggy] Spike: They say it's "dog".
48
Luigi: I think it's trying to communicate with us... Mario: Luigi, it's a mushroom!
49
Toad: You boys ain't from around here, are you? Mario Mario, Luigi Mario: Brooklyn.
50
Old Lady: Are you boys new in town? Mario: Listen, lady, we're looking for someone. And we're from Brooklyn. Old Lady: You know, boys, this is a really rough neighborhood. You really shouldn't be wandering around without a weapon. Mario: Yea. Old Lady: You got one? Luigi: ...No. Old Lady: ...All right... [brandishes a cattle-prod-like weapon] Old Lady: [shouts] Get 'em up, suckers!
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