Phillip: I may have a big mouth, but at least I keep it to myself.
(41 votes)
2
Adam: You're sick. Phillip: Somewhat, yeah. But I'm nice-looking... which makes up for a lot.
(37 votes)
3
Phillip: I just hope the next time we pass each other, I recognize who the hell you are.
(32 votes)
4
Phillip: I begged you to throw out the farm coat freshman year, I mean, you've lost both of us a lot of dates with that that thing on! You've had it since, birth, OK, so do me a favor and let's not pretend that the jacket and the, ahh, weight and the Bon Jovi hair are no big deal. Because when it comes to routine, you used to be like Mister goddamn Rogers!
(28 votes)
5
Adam: That's all I hear any more! "What's happening to you? What's going on with you?"
(28 votes)
6
Evelyn: Pornography is meant to titilate and excite you. I mean does a penis excite you? Any ol' penis? Did you like what you saw? Did it get you hot?
(1 vote)
7
Adam: It's not funny. Phillip: Yes, it is. I mean, it's not that funny that wives get beat up, but the fact that you look like one, that I find hilarious!
8
Evelyn: The only thing that would help him is a knife right through his fucking throat.
9
Adam: When Picasso took a shit, he didn't call it art. He knew the difference. That's what made him Picasso.
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