Wilson Joel: Do you have the yellow pages? Cashier at Pancake House: Customer copy out of the phone book. Wilson Joel: It's all torn to shreds. Cashier at Pancake House: I apologize, but that's our customer copy. Wilson Joel: Can I use your copy? Cashier at Pancake House: Sorry, convenient store next door might have one. Wilson Joel: But, you have one. Cashier at Pancake House: Sir, I'm sorry. Try next door. Wilson Joel: I just got finished eating your bad pancakes and got my plane stolen out of my car in your parking lot. Cashier at Pancake House: Want me to call the police? I can call the police. Wilson Joel: No, I just want to see the yellow pages. Cashier at Pancake House: What are you looking for? Wilson Joel: Planes. Cashier at Pancake House: Planes? Wilson Joel: Yea, model planes. You know remote control planes? Cashier at Pancake House: Toy Planes? Wilson Joel: Yea, toy planes. Cashier at Pancake House: You're not gonna find anything like that. Wilson Joel: Let me look... let me look. Cashier at Pancake House: You're not going to find it. Wilson Joel: Haha, yea you see that? You see that? One of your fucking friends stole my plane. Somebody who eats the bad food in this place all the time. That plane is going to ruin this whole place.
(40 votes)
2
Mary Ann Bankhead: What did she say? Wilson Joel: You wanna read it? Go ahead Mary Ann Bankhead: It doesn't have my name on it. Wilson Joel: Yea you're right. It doesn't. Mary Ann Bankhead: But if it did I would open it, because that's what she wants. Wilson Joel: Wanted. What she wanted. Mary Ann Bankhead: And you refuse to honor that. Wilson Joel: Is there something you wanna know? Mary Ann Bankhead: No, I think there is something you don't wanta know. Wilson Joel: I don't. I don't, I loved well. I did. I did, I loved well I don't want a letter. I don't want a fucking letter! Mary Ann Bankhead: She left reasons Wil. Wilson Joel: It's my name!
(39 votes)
3
Denny: So what do you got in there? Wilson Joel: What do I got? Denny: Yeah, Maura said you have a plane. Wilson Joel: Yeah. It's really, really... I just got it. Denny: Oh yeah, when? Wilson Joel: Oh, not today. I mean... not today! You know?
(38 votes)
4
Wilson Joel: 2 on 1 gas. Gas Station: Somebody over at Arlington hobby said they never heard of a plane that runs on gasoline. Wilson Joel: Well mine does. Gas Station: He said it was impossible because Wilson Joel: I own a plane and it runs on gas and I wanna fly the thing right fucking now! Gas Station: You don't have to yell. Wilson Joel: Well, I just want to buy 2 dollars worth of fucking gas! 2 on 1... 2 on 1.
(38 votes)
5
Model Boat Man: HEY! There's no swimming today! Wilson Joel: Do you know who I am? [pause] Wilson Joel: I am a big fan of Radio Control!
(38 votes)
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