Max: Dad, it's Big Foot! Goofy: Could you back up a bit, Mr. Foot, uh, you're out of focus.
(15 votes)
2
Goofy: [Half awake] How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon? Max: Uh... three and a half?
(15 votes)
3
Roxanne: Go on, go on. Good daddy.
(15 votes)
4
Goofy: This is a vacation with me and my best buddy. Max: Donald Duck? Goofy: No, silly, with you!
(15 votes)
5
Goofy: Hey, Maxie. Let's play a game. You think of someone and I'll try to guess who it is. Man or woman? Max: Aw, man. Goofy: Man? Hmm... That's a toughy... let's see... Walt Disney! Max: Right. Goofy: Boy, I'm good at this! Now I'll think of one.
(15 votes)
6
Max: Why are you doing this to me, Dad? Goofy: 'Cause, I don't want you to end up in the electric chair.
7
Goofy: I think the only thing to do now is to get you up on stage with this Power Line feller. Max: Really? Goofy: You just leave that up to me. Max: No, that's okay. Goofy: Why do you always think I'm going to lead you into some kind of calamity? Max: Uh, d-d-d-dad? Goofy: What is it, Max? Max: Look! [Max turns Goofy around; he sees that they are headed to a waterfall] Goofy: Hyuk, a waterfall. [alarmed] Goofy: A waterfall?
8
Bobby: Max, look, it's the Leaning Tower of Cheesa!
9
Goofy: I was only trying to take my boy fishing, okay? Max: I'm NOT your little boy anymore, Dad, I'm grown up. I've got my own life now! Goofy: I know that! I just wanted to be part of it. You're my son, Max, no matter how big you get you'll always be my son.
10
Pete: If you keep 'em under your thumb, they'll never end up in the gutter.
11
Goofy: Come on, Maxie, let's get this show on the road! Max: Um, just a minute you... Party... Animal... You!
12
[the car is rolling down a hill] Max: You should've put the brake on! Goofy: Why didn't you just put it on yourself? [Pulls brake lever, which breaks off] Max: See? You ruin everything. Goofy: Well, you ruined the vacation! Max: I never... Wanted to go... On this stupid... VACATION!
13
[Goofy enters Max's room] Goofy: Mornin', son! Max: [in his underwear] Dad! Goofy: Whoops. I forgot. [exits, knocks then re-enters] Goofy: Mornin', son!
14
Max: [singing] I've got less than an hour and when this is ended, I'll either be famous... Principal Mazur: [singing] ... Or you'll be suspended!
15
Max: [at the top of his rage] Arrrgh! This is the *stupidest* vacation! You drag me from home, jam me into this dumb car, drive me a million miles away to see some stupid rat show! [calms down] Max: Call me when the trip's over.
16
Pete: Since we're all being palsy-walsy, how about letting me hook up the RV? Goofy: Well... Pete: Oh, it's just a tiny little extension cord, you won't even notice it. Goofy: Oh, okay. Pete: Great. P.J.! [P.J. comes hauling a huge extension cord] Pete: Hey, Goof, why don't you order us a pizza? This could take a while.
17
Roxanne: Have a great time at the concert, Max. I'll see you on TV. Max: [to himself] I'm in deep sludge.
18
Pete: I heard the little mutant telling PJ that he switched the map.
19
Max#: [singing] Roxanne, please don't forget me. I will return someday. Though I might be in traction when I do!
20
Max#: [singing] The old man drives like such a klutz that I'm about to hurl my guts directly upon the open road.
21
Goofy: You look just like I did at your age. Max: Please don't say that, Dad.
22
Goofy: I saved the best for last. It's been handed down from Goof to Goof to Goof, and now, it's yours, son. Max: A stick? Goofy: No, silly. A fishing pole! Max: Fishing? We're going fishing? Goofy: Yup. Just like my dad and me did - two best buddies fishing on Lake Destiny *away from it all*! Max: I don't want to be *away from it all*, Dad, I like *it all*. Goofy: Look, Maxie. We're using the same map me and my dad used. We'll take the same route, make the same stops, see the same sights. Max: But that trip will take weeks, Dad! Goofy: Exactly! Getting there is half the fun! Max: Put the map away, Dad. It's not gonna happen. Goofy: Careful, son! You'll ruin my past... and our future. What the map says... we will follow. Max: That's very mystical and everything, Dad, but there's seriously this party I have to... Goofy: Oh, there will be plenty of time for parties when you're older, Maxie. Why, when I was your age, I've never even been invited to a party. Look at me, now! Max: Great, Dad.
23
Goofy: Came to see if you had any dirty clothes. Max: There they are. Help yourself. Goofy: Max, I thought we talked about this. Max: Sorry, Dad. I'll take care of it later. Goofy: What's the big rush? Max: I'm running late. Goofy: I can drive you to school on my way to work. Max: Oh, no thanks. I need the exercise.
24
Max#: [singing] She looked right through me, and who can blame her? I need a new me, plus some positive proof that I'm not just a goof.
25
Max: [referring to electronic equipment] Wow! All this is for us? Bobby: Mmm... Slurpage. Max: [taking the equipment] Oh, this is going to be so great, man! Bobby: [taking it back] Dude, me fondage, bro. Max: Oh, your fee. Yeah, right here. [gives him a can of cheese whiz] Bobby: [shouts] Cheddar! Aah-ooh! Cheddar whizzy!
26
Bobby: [hands Max his can of cheese whiz] Max, here. Guard this with your life, dude.
27
Principle Miss Maples: [dancing with Max] It's not my break, yet. Bobby: Yeah! Dance with her! Groove with her!
28
Goofy: Goodbye, house. Goodbye, mailbox. [runs over the fence] Goofy: Goodbye, pile of broken wood.
29
Goofy: [singing] Me and Max relaxing like the old days... Max#: [singing] This is worse than dragon breath and acne. Goofy: [singing] ... in a buddy-buddy kind of way. Max#: [singing] I'm so mad, I think I'm may explode! Goofy: [singing] When I see that highway, I could cry. Max#: [singing] You know, that's funny. So could I. Goofy, Max#: [singing] Just being out on the open road.
30
Pete: Small wilderness, dude! Didn't expect to see you here! Max: Apparently not. Pete: You're just jealous, man, cos you ain't got the moves! Max: You can keep the moves, but I wouldn't mind having this R.V. You're so lucky. Pete: Me? Oh, come on, man! You're the star. Going to the Powerline concert? Oh, it's unbelievable! Max: Who told you about that? Pete: Hey, come on! Everybody in town knows about it, Max! You are going to be famous, buddy... especially with Roxanne! Max: There's only one person who doesn't know about it yet, Peej. Pete: Who? Max: My dad.
31
Max: [writing] Dear Roxanne, couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd drop you a line. My dad and I are having a great time. We're only days away from L.A., and I can hardly wait for the big concert! Goofy: [in his sleep] More "Hi, Dad" soup, please? Max: [writing] Dear Roxanne, sorry I lied, I'm not really going to the Powerline concert. You may never want to see me again... [speaking] Max: Oh, man! I'm dead no matter what I do!
32
Goofy: You really had him fooled, Pete! Max: Me? You jumped out of your skin! Goofy: Uh-uh! I was just pretending for your sake! Max: Oh, right! Sure!
33
Peter Pete: Taking a break from the MTV Generation, eh? I can't say I blame you. [jumps into the spa] Peter Pete: People are always putting too much water in these things.
34
Max: Listen, Dad, about my directions... will you just listen to me? I gotta tell you something. Goofy: Why bother? I'm probably too stupid to understand, anyway, right? Max: Forget it.
35
Max: Hey, the car! Goofy: What? Now you want to drive too? Max: No, Dad! The car! Look! Goofy: The car? What did you do now, Max? Max: I didn't do anything, Dad! I only touched it!
36
Goofy: You locked it! Max: *I* locked it? It's your door! *You* locked it! Goofy: Well, *you* distracted me!
37
Goofy: You're doing the right thing, Max. Max: I know, but she'll probably never want to talk to me again. Goofy: If she doesn't, she's probably not the one for you. Max: That's what I'm afraid of.
38
Bobby: A little smokage!
39
[Max's stomach growls] Goofy: Max, was that Bigfoot or your stomach? Max: Man, I'm STARVING!
40
Max: [sees Goofy loading the car] Goin' somewhere, Pop? Goofy: Yep! Max: Cool. Have a good time. If you're gonna be more than a month, drop me a line.
41
[at concert] Goofy: Let's get you on stage! Max: Maybe this isn't such a good idea. [a pair of *very* attractive dancers walk past] Max: Hmmm, then again...
42
[Goofy pulls the cigarette lighter out of the dashboard to heat soup] Goofy: I'm glad this thing's good for somethin'.
43
Goofy: Are you okay, Maxie? [He slaps his face to wake him up] Max: What did you say? Goofy: That's right. A vacation, son! We'll spend some real quality time together. [hugs him tight against his belly] Max: [traumatically shocked] I think I'm gonna be sick.
44
[Goofy and Max are trapped by Bigfoot in their car, and it is about Max's suppertime. They are waiting for his soup to warm up, and Goofy starts chuckling with his mouth closed] Max: What's so funny? Goofy: "Hi Dad" soup. Max: Huh? Goofy: Don't tell me you don't remember "Hi Dad" soup? Oh, come on. Sure you do. You used to spell things out using the letters. Like, uh, "Hi Dad", or "Maxie" ,or -... Max: "Ambidextrous"? Goofy: Yeah, that's - - Huh? Naaa, little words, like, uh -... Max: "Hasta la vista"? Goofy: Like "bye-bye". Max: Or "I pledge allegiance"-... Goofy: A-hyuk, or "I love you." [They suddenly get a shock of sadness, then turn to face at the windshield] Max: [happy again] Is it, uh, is it soup yet? Goofy: Oh, oh. I almost forgot. [Punches holes on can with buck teeth]
45
Goofy: [talking to Principle Mazur on the phone] Hello. Principal Mazur: Yes, Mr. Goof. This is Principal Mazur. I'm calling in regard to your son, Maximillian. Goofy: Max? Oh, my gosh! Is he hurt? Principal Mazur: No, Mr. Goof. He's in trouble! Goofy: Trouble? What kind of trouble? Principal Mazur: Dressed like a gang member... Goofy: Gang member? Principal Mazur: ...your son caused the entire student body to break into a riotous frenzy! Goofy: Riot? It couldn't be my... Principal Mazur: If I were you, Mr. Goof, I'd seriously re-evaluate the way you're raising your child before he ends up in the *electric chair*! Goofy: [getting traumatically shocked] The electric chair?
46
Powerline: [singing] If we listen to each other's heart We'll find we're never too far apart, And maybe love is the reason why. For the first time ever, we're seeing it eye to eye.
47
Max: My life's a living... Lester: Hello, little buddy! [a man in a Lester Possum costume comes up to Max. Max turns his back on him and tries to ignore him. Lester comes around to Max's front] Lester: Who's your favorite possum? Max: Don't touch me! Lester: Aw, why such a long face? You're so sad! Boo hoo hoo! I know! You need a big hug from Lester! Max: Don't even think about IIIIIITTT... [Lester gives Max a giant hug] Lester: See? Now you feel all good inside! Max: [Max slaps Lester which turns his false head backwards] BEAT IT, Doofus!
48
Max: It's Powerline, only the biggest rock star on the planet. Goofy: Not bigger than Xavier Cugat, the mambo king. Everybody mambo!
49
Nerd in the audience: Yo, Stacey! Talk to, talk to me, talk to me, baby!
50
Max: But, Dad, I don't even know how to fish. Goofy: That's never stopped me. I'm gonna show you a little secret that has been handed down for twelve or thirteen Goof generations: the Perfect Cast. Max: The perfect what? Goofy: The Perfect Cast. My dad taught it to me when I was your age, and now I pass it on to you. Watch carefully now. You gotta stay loose, relaxed. Keep your feet apart. Now, two o'clock, ten o'clock, quarter to three, tour jeté, twist, pas de deux, I'm a little teapot, then the windup... and let 'er fly! The Perfect Cast.
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