Senior Flight Attendant: [after Jackson and Lisa come out of the bathroom] Excuse me! This is not a motel!
(20 votes)
2
Jackson Rippner: Whatever female-based, emotion-driven dilemma you may be dealing with right now, I sympathize with you. But right now, we need to break this down into male-based, fact-driven logic.
(18 votes)
3
Jackson Rippner: [smirking darkly at Lisa] When we get out of this, I may have to steal you.
(17 votes)
4
Rebecca: [to the flight attendant, after Jackson follows Lisa into the airline bathroom] A man went in there. Young Flight Attendant: Oh, that's okay, honey. They share the same ones up here. Rebecca: But a lady's in there, too. Young Flight Attendant: Oh, this is one of *those* flights.
(17 votes)
5
Senior Flight Attendant: [to Rippner while collecting refuse from the passengers and erroneously assuming he has had sex in the lavatory] Trash.
(17 votes)
6
[from trailer] Jackson Rippner: Sometimes bad things happen to good people.
(2 votes)
7
Jackson Rippner: Do your dad a favor and stop gambling with his life!
(2 votes)
8
Lisa Reisert: That's actually my seat. Jackson Rippner: You're kidding. Lisa Reisert: Well, I don't know. That says 18G. [checks boarding pass] Jackson Rippner: You're not kidding.
9
Jackson Rippner: [Jackson puts an initialed wallet on the airline tray] J.R. Joe Reisert. Your father. Lisa Reisert: Where did you get that? Jackson Rippner: Grabbed it off your dad's desk... next to your graduation picture.
10
Jackson Rippner: [to Lisa] You tell the flight attendant and your dad dies. [Lisa starts to cry as the Senior Flight Attendant arrives] Senior Flight Attendant: What can I do for you? Jackson Rippner: She's just had a really rough day - a death in the family.
11
Lisa Reisert: Is it Jack for short? Jackson Rippner: No. I haven't gone by Jack since I was ten years old. Jackson Rippner: Last name's Rippner. Lisa Reisert: Jack Rippner... Jack theee... oooohhhh. Jackson Rippner: There you go. Lisa Reisert: That wasn't very nice of your parents. Jackson Rippner: That's what I told them. Before I killed them.
12
Jackson Rippner: I'm going to finish this. Lisa Reisert: Not in my house.
13
Bob Taylor: You want us to fill in a comment card? Lisa Reisert: Yes. fill in a comment card... and then shove it up your ass.
14
Lisa Reisert: I need you to do something for me. Cynthia: Are you sure you're OK? Lisa Reisert: Cynthia, please don't ask me again if I'm OK. [line goes dead] Lisa Reisert: Something's come up. We need to change Keefe's room. Can you pull up the file? [plane shakes] Lisa Reisert: Were going to move him to room 4080, and then I need you to... Jackson Rippner: [grabs phone] Hello? Cynthia?
15
Lisa Reisert: There is a man in my house trying to kill me. 911 Operator: If you can, lock yourself in a room. Lisa Reisert: Okay. [hangs up the phone, goes over and closes the door and Jackson is behind it]
16
Jackson Rippner: [after Lisa groans and puts her head between her knees] What's wrong now? Lisa Reisert: You hit me and slammed me into the wall, remember?
17
Lisa Reisert: [referring to the scar on her chest] It happened in the parking lot... the scar... two years ago.In the middle of the day... he held a knife to my throat the hole time. Ever since I was trying to convince myself of one thing over and over... Jackson Ripner: That it was beyond your control? Lisa Reisert: No... that it would never happen again. [she stabs him in the neck with a pen]
18
Lisa Reisert: Thank you for distracting me. Jackson Rippner: That's not what I was doing. Lisa Reisert: What were you doing then? Jackson Rippner: Just keeping the focus on you and your dad.
19
Jackson Rippner: So, what are the odds... wait, you're not stalking me are you?
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