Other Titles • You've Got Mail • You Have Mail (1997) • You've Got M@il (1998) • e-m@il für Dich (1999)
Quotes from You've Got Mail (1998)
1
Kathleen Kelly: Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, not small, but circumscribed. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void.
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2
George Pappas: For me the Internet is just yet another way of being rejected by women.
3
Frank: What about you, is there someone else? Kathleen Kelly: No. No, but, but there's the dream of someone else.
4
Joe Fox: I like Patricia. I *love* Patricia. Patricia makes COFFEE nervous.
5
Joe Fox: You're crazy about him... Kathleen Kelly: Yes. I am. Joe Fox: Then why don't you run off with him? What are you waiting for? Kathleen Kelly: I don't actually know him. Joe Fox: Really? Kathleen Kelly: We only know each other - oh, God, you're not going to believe this... Joe Fox: Let me guess. From the Internet. Kathleen Kelly: Yes. Joe Fox: You've got mail. Kathleen Kelly: Yes. Joe Fox: Three very powerful words. Kathleen Kelly: Yes.
6
Joe Fox: The Godfather answers all of life's questions. What should I pack for my summer vacation? "Leave the gun, take the cannoli."
7
Joe Fox: The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino. Joe Fox: [exits] Next customer in line: Tall decaf cappucino.
8
[Discussing the new FoxBooks superstore] Joe Fox: Hey, you know what? We should announce ourselves to the neighborhood. Just let them know, here we come. Kevin: Oh, no, this is the Upper West Side, man. We might as well tell 'em we're opening up a - a crack house. They're gonna hate us. Soon as they hear, they're gonna be lining up... Kevin: - to picket the big bad chain store... Kevin: - that's out to destroy... Joe Fox: - everything they hold dear. Kevin: Yeah. Joe Fox: Do you know what, we are gonna seduce them. We're gonna seduce them with our square footage, and our discounts, and ourdeep armchairs, and... Kevin, Joe Fox: Our cappuccino. Joe Fox: That's right. They're gonna hate us at the beginning, but... Kevin, Joe Fox: - but we'll get 'em in the end. Joe Fox: Do you know why? Kevin: Why? Joe Fox: Because we're going to sell them cheap books and legal addictive stimulants. In the meantime, we'll just put up a big sign: "Coming soon, a FoxBooks superstore and the end of civilization as you know it."
9
Schuyler Fox: Your father is getting married. Joe Fox: Really? Nelson Fox: Yes. Joe Fox: Congratulations. Nelson Fox: Thank you. Joe Fox: Why? Nelson Fox: Who knows? Joe Fox: Love? Nelson Fox: Possible.
10
Frank: [to TV interviewer] Thank your.
11
Birdie Conrad: You're daring to march into the unknown armed with [pause] Birdie Conrad: Nothing. Have a sandwich.
12
Christina Plutzker: [repeated by George and Birdie, to Kathleen] He stood you up?
13
Joe Fox: [Voice over] My father is marrying a woman who took interior decorating lessons at Caesar's Palace.
14
Kathleen Kelly: ...but no one will remember you. And maybe no one will remember me either, but there are plenty of people who remember my mother, and they thought she was fine, and they thought her store was something special. You are nothing but a suit. Joe Fox: [looking creastfallen] That's my cue.
15
Joe Fox: You know, sometimes I wonder... Kathleen Kelly: What? Joe Fox: Well... if i hadn't been "Fox Books" and you hadn't been "The Shop Around the Corner," and you and I had just met... Kathleen Kelly: I know. Joe Fox: Yeah, yeah. I would've asked for your number. And I wouldn't have been able to wait 24 hours before calling you up and saying, Hey, how about... oh, how about some coffee, or drinks, or dinner, or a movie... for as long as we both shall live?
16
Joe Fox: You can forgive this guy for standing you up, but you can't forgive me for this little thing... of putting you out of business?
17
Kathleen Kelly: God, I didn't, I didn't realize. I didn't, I didn't know. Joe Fox: [finishing the sentence] who you were with? [bad Italian accent] Joe Fox: I didn't know who you were with. Kathleen Kelly: Excuse me? Joe Fox: It's from The Godfather. [small laugh] Joe Fox: Sorry, it's from The Godfather. It's, when the, ah, movie producer realizes that Tom Hagen is an emissary of Vito Corleone. It's just before the horse's head ends up in the bed all the bloody sheets, you know, wakes up, and it's [imitates horrified scream] Joe Fox: ah. AaHH. AAAHH. AAHHHH. AAHHH. [pauses] Joe Fox: Never mind.
18
Joe Fox: It wasn't... personal. Kathleen Kelly: What is that supposed to mean? I am so sick of that. All that means is that it wasn't personal to you. But it was personal to me. It's *personal* to a lot of people. And what's so wrong with being personal, anyway? Joe Fox: Uh, nothing. Kathleen Kelly: Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.
19
Particia Eden: When I get out of here, I'm having my eyeballs lasered.
20
George Pappas: I'm going to get some candles cuz it make my apartment smell Moss-a.
21
Frank Navasky: Name me one thing, ONE, that we've gained from technology. Kathleen Kelly: Electricity Frank Navasky: That's one. [points to computer] Frank Navasky: You think this machine is your friend but it's not.
22
Joe Fox: Brinkley is my dog. He loves the streets of New York as much as I do. Although he likes to eat bits of pizza and bagels off the sidewalk and I prefer to buy them.
23
Kathleen Kelly: What will NY152 say today I wonder. I turn on my computer. I wait impatiently as it connects. I go online, and my breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words: You've got mail. I hear nothing. Not even a sound on the streets of New York, just the beating of my own heart. I have mail. From you.
24
Kevin: The electrical contractor called, his truck hit a deer last night, so he's not gonna be here until tomorrow. And the upstairs shelves are delayed because the shipment of pine we ordered has beetles. Joe Fox: Very good, *very* good. Kevin: And we got a 50,000 dollar ticket for construction workers peeing off the roof. Joe Fox: Great, that is great. Is the electrician here today?
25
[In the backgroud horns are honking, tires are skidding and people are shouting in the street] Kathleen Kelly: [seriously] Don't you just love New York in the fall?
26
Joe Fox: Don't you love New York in the fall? It makes me wanna buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address. On the other hand, this not knowing has its charms.
27
Kathleen Kelly: Is it infidelity if you're involved with somebody on email? Christina Plutzker: Have you had sex? Kathleen Kelly: No of course not. I don't even know him. Christina Plutzker: No, I mean CYBERsex. Kathleen Kelly: No Christina Plutzker: Well, you know what? Don't do it- 'cause the minute you do, they lose all respect for you.
28
Joe Fox: Hey. This fabric on the couch, does it have a name? Nelson Fox: Money. Joe Fox: Huh? Nelson Fox: It's name is MONey.
29
Birdie Conrad: What are you girls talking about? Christina Plutzker: Cybersex. Birdie Conrad: I tried to have cybersex once, but I kept getting a busy signal.
30
Nelson Fox: How much son? How much you payin'? Joe Fox: well whatever it costs it won't be as much as that exquisitely uncomfortable mohair episode there, which is NOW ALL OVER MY SUIT.
31
Kathleen Kelly: Once I read a story about a butterfly in the subway, and today, I saw one. It got on at 42nd, and off at 59th, where, I assume it was going to Bloomingdales to buy a hat that will turn out to be a mistake - as almost all hats are.
32
Frank Navasky: Kathleen. YOU, are a lone reed. You are a lone reed, standing tall, waving boldly in the corrupt sands of commerce. Kathleen Kelly: I am a lone reed.
33
nm0386645Annabelle Fox: Maureen's getting a divorce. Joe Fox: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Maureen: 's My own fault - never marry a man who lies. [giggling] Joe Fox: That is so wise. yes, Annabelle, remember that.
34
Joe Fox: I'm sure you must be late for something - volunteering at the Henry Street Settlement, or rolling bandages for Bosnian Refugees. Gillian Quinn: I AM - I'm having my eggs harvested. Joe Fox: And getting those eggs harvested.
35
George Pappas: Who belongs to this fish?
36
Nelson Fox: Perfect. Keep those West Side, liberal, nuts, psudo- intellectuals... Joe Fox: Readers Dad, they're called readers. Nelson Fox: Don't do that son, don't romanticize them.
37
George Pappas: The, uh, illustrations are hand tipped. Joe Fox: And that's why it costs so much? George Pappas: No, that's why it's WORTH so much.
38
nm0386645Annabelle Fox: Oh, that's not my Dad, that's my nephew. Kathleen Kelly: You know, I don't really think that HE could be your nephew. Joe Fox: No, no, no - it's true - Annabelle is my, aunt. Isn't that right Aunt Annabelle?
39
Kathleen Kelly: What is THAT? What ARE you doing? You're taking all the caviar? That caviar is a garnish.
40
Kathleen Kelly: [to Joe] What is that? What is that? What are you doing? You're taking all the caviar? That caviar is a *garnish*! [Joe scoops up more caviar and dumps it on his plate]
41
Joe Fox: Is it about love? [voice over] Joe Fox: Please say no. Kathleen Kelly: No. [voice over] Kathleen Kelly: How sweet is that?
42
Matthew Fox: F-O-X Kathleen Kelly: That is amazing - you can spell 'fox'? Can you spell 'dog'? Matthew Fox: F-O-X
43
Joe Fox: Whatever you do, just don't listen to anything I say.
44
Kathleen Kelly: When you read a book as a child, it becomes a part of your identity in a way that no other reading in your whole life does.
45
Frank Navasky: Joe Fox? Joe Fox: F-O-X Frank Navasky: The inventor of the superstore, of course. The enemy of the mid-list novel, the destroyer of 'City Books'. Tell me, how do you sleep at night? Patricia Eden: Ah. I use a wonderful, over the counter drug - 'Ultradorm'. Don't that the whole thing, just half, and you will wake up without even the tiniest hangover.
46
George Pappas: This place is a tomb. I'm going to the nut shop where it's fun.
47
Joe Fox: I better go deliver this [drink] Joe Fox: I have a very thirsty date - she's part camel.
48
Joe Fox: Hello it's Mr. Nasty.
49
Joe Fox: [on the News] I sell cheap books, I do, so sue me. Kevin: That's what you said? Joe Fox: Well yeah - that's not all I said. I can't believe those bastards. O said we were great, I said you could sit and read for hours and no one will bother you. I said we have 150,000 titles. I showed them the New York section. I said we were a God Damn Piazza. A place in the city where people can mingle & mix & be. Kevin: Piazza? Joe Fox: I was eloquent - Sh**. Kevin: Piazza.
50
Birdie Conrad: If you nee more ask me, I'm VERY rich. I bought Intel at six.
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