Mike McDermott: I feel like Buckner walking back into Shea.
(17 votes)
2
Professor Petrovsky: We can't run from ourselves, our destiny chooses us.
(15 votes)
3
Teddy KGB: If you don't have my money then you are mine.
(15 votes)
4
Teddy KGB: It hurts doesn't it? Your hopes dashed, your dreams down the toilet. And your fate is sitting right besides you.
(15 votes)
5
Mike McDermott: We can't run from who we are. Our destiny chooses us.
(15 votes)
6
Mike McDermott: Would you stop fucking around, for five goddamn minutes for once in your fucking life? Worm: Whoa, Jesus, what happened? My old man just walked in.
7
Mike McDermott: You were lookin' for that third three, but you forgot that Professor Green folded on Fourth Street and now you're representing that you have it. The DA made his two pair, but he knows they're no good. Judge Kaplan was trying to squeeze out a diamond flush but he came up short and Mr. Eisen is futilely hoping that his queens are going to stand up. So like I said, the Dean's bet is $20.
8
[His girlfriend says they don't have time for sex now] Mike McDermott: I'll be really quick. You won't feel a thing.
9
Mike McDermott: Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.
10
Mike McDermott: If you had it to do all over again, knowing what would happen, would you make the same choice? Professor Petrovsky: What choice?
11
Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Where did you come up with the scratch for that? You've been rolling fags in the Village again, haven't you?
12
Worm: She's really got him by the balls. Petra: That's not so bad, is it? Worm: It depends on the grip!
13
[Mike's girlfriend has just left him over his broken promise not to play poker] Worm: You know what always cheers me up? Mike McDermott: No, what's that? Worm: Rolled up aces over kings. Check-raising stupid tourists and taking huge pots off of them. Playing all-night high-limit Hold'em at the Taj, "where the sand turns to gold." Stacks and towers of checks I can't even see over. Mike McDermott: Fuck it, let's go. Worm: Don't tease me. Mike McDermott: Let's play some cards. Worm: Yes!
14
Mike McDermott: Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?
15
Teddy KGB: That ace could not have helped you. Mike McDermott: [laughs] You're right Teddy, the ace didn't help. [pushes chips towards the center and flops down his cards] Mike McDermott: I flopped a nut straight.
16
Teddy KGB: Lays down a monster. The fuck did you lay that down?
17
Worm: Hey! If you want to see this seventh card you're gonna stop speakin' fuckin' Sputnick.
18
Worm: I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the fuckin' rake. Mike McDermott: What the fuck are you talkin' about. What saying? Worm: I-I don't know. There ought to be one though.
19
Mike McDermott: You can't lose what you don't put in the middle. [pause] Mike McDermott: But you can't win much either.
20
Teddy KGB: He beat me... Straight up... Pay him... Pay that man his money.
21
Mike McDermott: I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage.
22
Taki: What did you think he had? Does he look like a man beaten by jacks? Zizzo: Jacks are a monster compared to the crap you've played Taki: Fuuc you... fuck you... Zizzo: Fuck Me? Fuck You!
23
Teddy KGB: [after Mike raises in the very first game against Teddy] That's a position raise, I call.
24
Teddy KGB: Want a cookie?
25
Mike McDermott: It's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
26
Mike McDermott: It's like the nature channel... you don't see Piranhas eating themselves, do you?
27
Worm: Why do you think your moves are so grand and noble and I'm always the idiot piece of shit!
28
Mike McDermott: The game is no limit hold 'em. The Cadillac of poker.
29
Mike McDermott: Are you satisfied now, Teddy? Because I can keep busting you up all night if you like.
30
Mike McDermott: In "Confessions of a Winning Poker Player," Jack King said, "Few players recall big pots they have won, strange as it seems, but every player can remember with remarkable accuracy the outstanding tough beats of his career." It seems true to me, cause walking in here, I can hardly remember how I built my bankroll, but I can't stop thinking about the way I lost it.
31
Teddy KGB: In my club, I will splash the pot whenever the fuck I please.
32
Worm: You wanna see the seventh card, stop speaking fucking sputnik! I'm sure you guys were talking about pirogies and snow but let's cut that out.
33
Worm: Like my uncle Les used to say "When the money is gone, it's time to move on". So enjoy it, you secret handshaking assholes.
34
Mike McDermott: You comin' up? Lester 'Worm' Murphy: No, I've been standin' out here all this time just to say hi. Mike McDermott: All right, listen, things haven't been that smooth on the homefront so, you know, tone it down a little, all right? Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Tone done what, motherfucker?
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