X-Men (2000)

'3BlackChicks Review...'

Rated PG-13; running time 140 minutes Genre: Action IMDB site: http://us.imdb.com/Details?0120903 Official site: http://www.x-men-the-movie.com/ Written by:Christopher McQuarrie, Ed Solomon Directed by: Bryan Singer Cast: Patrick Stewart, Sir Ian McKellen, Hugh Jackman, Anna Paquin, Famke Janssen, Halle Berry, James Marsden, Ray Park, Tyler Mane, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Bruce Davison, Shawn Ashmore (Bobby)

Review Copyright Rose Cooper, 2000 Review URL: http://www.3blackchicks.com/bamsxmen.html

Let me just say right off the bat that the closest I ever got to "X-Men" comics was [I can't believe I'm confessing this] when I used to read "Betty And Veronica"; that, and watching my sons play the "X-Men" arcade game. I had a passing knowledge of the basic idea of the Super(anti)Heroes, but not much more than your average Chick. Suffice it to say, except for my ongoing Beef that Angela "Born To Be 'Storm'" Bassett wasn't in it, I went into this flick with a clean slate, not quite knowing what to expect.

And while I didn't come out with nearly the "wow" feeling that I had from a similar-in-spirit flick - 1999's THE MATRIX - I can honestly say that X-MEN was a damned sight better than most of the live-action remakes of cartoons and comics I've had the sorry "pleasure" to witness [cf BATMAN AND ROBIN and ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE]. Heck, I can say more than that: I actually liked X-MEN.

The Story (WARNING: **spoilers contained below**): In the not-too-distant future, genetically-altered mutants will become a "forward leap" in mankind's evolution. And, as has been proven in mankind's past dealings with those seen as Different, that evolution will be feared - possibly to the point of extinction.

As an orphaned survivor of the Holocaust in Poland, Magneto (Sir Ian McKellen) has no intention of being vulnerable to the whims of mortal men again. Using his powers of literal magnetism, he gathers other mutants of similar mind - including super-strong Sabretooth (the aptly-named Tyler Mane); the flexible (of tongue and limb) Toad (Ray Park); and shapeshifting Mystique (Rebecca Romijn-Stamos) - to gain the upper hand on normal humans before McCarthy-ite Senator Kelly (Bruce Davison) and his ilk try to legislate the mutants out of existence.

But Magneto and the Bad Mutants have to contend with the X-Men: Wolverine (Hugh Jackman), a loner whose whole body is his weapon; Rogue (Anna Paquin), a sensitive teen whose mere touch can bring death; Cyclops (James Marsden), whose unshielded eyes have the same effect as Rogue's touch; Storm (Halle Berry), who can control weather in powerful ways; Dr. Jean Grey (Famke Janssen), who has the gifts of telepathy and telemetry; and their leader, super-psychic Professor Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart). Despite their ability to cause mutants permanent grief, Prof. X still believes in the basic goodness of human beings, and brings in young and old mutants into his School For The Gifted to teach them how to Use Their Powers For Good, to best serve humanity.

The Upshot: The best compliments I can pay to X-MEN are that it did not get overwhelmed by its (pretty decent) special effects, and that it provided a good (without being condescending) introduction to a world formerly known only to fans of the comic books, and to a lesser extent, the video games. Not being plugged in to either of those pasttimes, I cannot say with any authority whether it was a completely valid introduction, but, as I mentioned earlier, I've seen much, much worse. I can dig this one.

Effects-wise, I wasn't as impressed as I thought I'd be; once you get past their basic powers - Sabertooth's Bigness, Cyclops' fire-shooting eyes, and Wolverine's claws - the thrill is gone. I had high hopes of seeing Something Special from Storm, but was let down there, too. In fact, the most impressive part of the flick was Cyclops' motorcycle [yes, I know: spoken as a true gearhead]. Still, Mystique was true to form [uh, no pun intended], and Toad was someone I'd Like To Get To Know Better...if you know what I mean [And I Think That You Do].

performances of its cast; wherever the writing and direction went lacking (and it was, in quite a few places; it wasn't until more than halfway through the movie, for instance, that X-MEN seemed to recognize the potential humor in Wolverine's and Cyclops' pissing contest), the actors came through with better-than-expected, honest depictions of their comic-book characters. It would've been all too easy to play it for camp, or go the "Batman" route with overly-maudlin performances; to their credit, this mostly-unglittery (with obvious exceptions) cast played it straight without being stodgy or overblown.

This first in an apparent series (that "ending" was anything but) was obviously Wolverine and Rogue's story, and actors Jackman and Paquin had the lion's share of the lines and action. They did well, as did Stewart as the hopeful Professor X and McKellen as the very bitter Magneto. Most of the rest of the players were there in truly supporting roles, whether limited by their own acting abilities (most notably Berry as Storm; I'll get to her later) or by the necessity of their character's limited movements (I felt bad for Tyler Mane; after all, what can a big Sabretooth do but roar excessively?) Ray Park, though, Worked It as Toad; by far my favorite mutant, he turned Being Bad into an art form. Bru'man most def had an Evil Tigger quality about him.

Having said all that, while I did enjoy the movie, I walked away feeling somewhat unsatisfied, and with more questions than answers. Probably much to the delight of the filmmakers, who've set this up as a "Batman"-like franchise. One can only hope X-MEN as a series has more staying power. And, hopefully for the follow-up flick, a stronger ending.

The "Black Factor" [ObDisclaimer: We Are Not A Monolith]: Another disclaimer: it's no secret that I don't hold a lot of stock in Halle Berry's acting abilities, and that I would've much preferred Angela Bassett in this role [dammit, she really was Born To Be Storm. grumble.] Even with that bias, though, I really did try to give Berry the benefit of the doubt. She almost had me on her side; her character not having a whole lot to do but speak her limited lines with a weirdly affected accent, I could've lived with her just Standing There, Being Pretty.

And then she had to ruin my illusions with a Keanu Moment (SMALL SPOILER AHEAD): "You know what happens when a toad gets hit by lightning? Same thing as what happens to everything else." (END SPOILER)

Whoa.

Hmm...is it too late to suggest Grace Jones for the next flick?

Bammer's Bottom Line: It ain't rocket science [hmmm...actually, in this case, it might just be] but X-MEN was a good fun romp for an hour or two; certainly, as a direct-from-the-comics flick, it ran circles around TEENAGE NINJA MUTANT TURTLES. Not that that'd be all that big a circle to start with...

I'll be impressed when they add the Computer Geek Mutant.

Rose "Bams" Cooper                            /~\
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Copyright Rose Cooper, 2000                `~-._'c    /
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