Buddy Bragg: Here ma'am. Let me help you with these. Beautiful young lady like you shouldn't be carrying groceries. Let a man do that for you. Parking Lot Woman: Now, I didn't ask you for help, so don't expect a tip. Buddy Bragg: Oh, that's okay ma'am. I'll just take your car.
(1 vote)
2
"Here, ma'am. Let me help you with these. Beautiful young lady like you shouldn't be carrying groceries. Let a man do that for you."--Buddy Bragg (Ving Rhames)
3
"Now, I didn't ask you for help, so don't expect a tip."--Woman in parking lot
4
"Oh, that's okay, ma'am. I'll just take your car."--Buddy Bragg
5
"Oh, man...if I wasn't stoned, there is no way you would have talked me into this!"--Glenn Michaels (Steve Zahn)
6
Glenn Michaels: Oh, man, if I wasn't stoned there is no way you would have talked me into this!
7
Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: [realizing his gun is empty, as Foley points one at him] You don't have an extra clip I can use, do you? Jack Foley: No, I don't. Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: You ain't never shot a gun before, have you? Jack Foley: Not until recently, no. Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: You nervous? Jack Foley: A little, yeah. Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: You know, in a situation like this, there's a high potentiality for the common motherfucker to bitch out. Jack Foley: So I figure, why take a chance? [pulls the trigger]
8
Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: Well, the man don't just have to die, Foley. I mean, he could accidentally hurt himself falling down on something real hard, you know? Like a shiv, or my dick?
9
Jack Foley: It's like seeing someone for the first time, and you look at each other for a few seconds, and there's this kind of recognition like you both know something. Next moment the person's gone, and it's too late to do anything about it.
10
[Opening a birthday gift from dad] Karen Sisco: Oh my God, it's beautiful. Marshall Sisco: It's a um... Karen Sisco: Sig-Sauer 380. Marshall Sisco: Right. Karen Sisco: I love it, thanks Dad.
11
Jack Foley: Is this your first time being robbed? [Loretta nods] Jack Foley: You're doing great.
12
[with Karen's heel on his back] Chino: Wow! You are mean!
13
Jack Foley: I know a guy who walks into a bank with a little glass bottle. He tells everyone it's nitroglycerine. He scores some money off the teller, walks out. On his way out, the bottle breaks, he slips on it and knocks himself out. The "nitro" was Canola oil. I know more fucked-up bank robbers than ones who know what they're doing. I doubt if one in twenty could tell you where the dye pack is. Most bank robbers are fucking morons.
14
Jack Foley: Alright, now I can say that I fucked a U.S. marshal. Do you think I will?
15
Jack Foley: Where's your sunglasses? Did somebody finally step on them for you?
16
Jack Foley: Hey! Sign says "shut the fuck up," or can't you fellas read? [points to a sign that says "Quiet Please"] Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: The fuck you talkin' to man? You got a problem over there, Foley? Jack Foley: Yeah, I got a problem: this is the dumbest fuckin' shakedown in the history of dumb shakedowns. Five hundred bucks for a pillow?
17
Adele: Hey bank robber! Hey, want some advice? Next time keep the engine running.
18
Jack Foley: Give me a minute to talk to Buddy. Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: You got two minutes, that's all. Make up your mind, Foley. Jack Foley: I wasn't asking permission.
19
Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: I've, uh, vertically integrated myself. You know, diversified and shit, and now I'm into the occasional grand larceny, home invasion... shit like that.
20
[Snoopy's prison bodyguard, Himey, threatens Jack] Jack Foley: Uh oh. Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: You're fucked up now, man. That's Himey. Protege of mine. Ranked number thirty-two in the federal prison system. Jack Foley: Thirty-two? Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: That's right. Jack Foley: Outta what? Twenty?
21
Jack Foley: What kind of name is Hejira? Hejira: It's Islamic. Jack Foley: What's it mean? Hejira: The Hejira was Mohammed's flight from Mecca in 632. Brothers in Leavenworth gave me that name. Jack Foley: You were in Leavenworth? Hejira: For a time. Jack Foley: What's that mean? Hejira: Means, when the time came, I left. Jack Foley: You broke out? Hejira: I prefer to think of it as an exodus from an undesirable place.
22
Jack Foley: What's in this can? Karen Sisco: That's for your breath. You could use it. Squirt some in your mouth. Jack Foley: Yeah, well that's mace, isn't it?
23
Glenn Michaels: Oh, I see, you guys are cynical.
24
Kenneth: Tuffi was a good bitch, and I gave her what every good bitch wants, a bone.
25
Jack Foley: You'd be surprised about what you can get, if you ask for it the right way.
26
Marshall Sisco: Yeah, so I read in the paper that this guy escapes from jail, ends up at this guy's wife's house and she let's him in. So he tells her his story and she feels, sorry for him, and they sleep together. Ray Nicolet: Yeah. Marshall Sisco: Yeah, so I guess that's how you score these days.
27
Glenn Michaels: What are you going to do with a hatchet?
28
[Ray is wearing an "FBI" t-shirt] Marshall Sisco: Hey Ray, do you ever wear one that says "undercover"? Ray Nicolet: [pause] No.
29
Jack Foley: Fuck, fuck, fuck! Cops: I think you flooded it. Jack Foley: Wanna hear a funny story? Cops: Shut up and get out of the car!
30
Karen Sisco: Oh, that's right, you have my wallet. Why don't you come by the house, you can drop it off? Jack Foley: Sure, I'll leave it with the S.W.A.T. guy who answers the door.
31
Marshall Sisco: Are you gonna go get him? Karen Sisco: It's possible, why? Marshall Sisco: Well, I was thinking, you could have a nice time with him on the ride down - like picking up where your interlude or whatever you call it left off - and then you could throw him in the shit house!
32
Buddy Bragg: You want to take her to my place, get cleaned up, come out of the bathroom with your aftershave on, and she goes "Oh! I had you all wrong."
33
Jack Foley: Take your sunglasses off. Glenn Michaels: I see better with 'em on, man. Jack Foley: You don't take them off, I'm gonna throw them off the overpass while they're still on your head. Go wait in the car. Glenn Michaels: Um, we're in civilization now so you can ease up just a little bit. Jack Foley: I'm sorry! I'd like you to wait in the car please. Take her, put her in the back. Glenn Michaels: Okay... in the trunk? Jack Foley: IN THE BACKSEAT! IN THE BACKSEAT!
34
[interrupting a man who is rambling about his life, trying to pick her up in a bar] Karen Sisco: Andy. Really... who gives a shit?
35
Maurice "Snoopy" Miller: It was worse than you thought it would be, wasn't it? Yeah, you with the bad boys now, baby.
36
Karen Sisco: You're not dumb. Jack Foley: [starts to say something, then laughs] Well, I don't know. You can't do three falls and say you have much of a brain.
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