Gen. Decker: Intellectuals! Liberals! Peacemongers! IDIOTS!
(16 votes)
2
President Dale: Why can't we work out our differences? Why can't we work things out? Little people, why can't we all just get along?
(15 votes)
3
Richie Norris: I want to thank my Grandma for always being so good to me, and, and for helping save the world and everything.
(15 votes)
4
[Watching an alien on TV] First Lady: I'm not allowing that thing in my house. President Dale: Sweetie, we may have to. The people expect me to meet with them. First Lady: Well they're not going to eat off the Van Buren china.
(15 votes)
5
Art Land: I'm not a crook, I'm ambitious. There's a difference.
(15 votes)
6
Richie Norris: Wow, he just made the international sign of the doughnut.
7
[Challenging a Martian to a fistfight] Byron Williams: No weapons! No tricks! Just you and me! Byron Williams! The heavyweight champion of the world!
8
First Lady: [as the chandelier is falling on her] The Nancy Reagan chandelier!
9
Rude Gambler: [after running into a martian] Holy shit!
10
Grandma Florence Norris: [as Taffy is giving her the Medal of Honor] Thank you, honey. But don't you dare let anything like this happen again.
11
Billy Glenn Norris: [about to get on the bus to leave for the Army] So long, retards.
12
[last lines] Richie Norris: Is that OK? Taffy Dale: Yea. Do you got a girlfriend? Richie Norris: No.
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